A Little Sunshine Please

GEDSC DIGITAL CAMERAThe room was a little bit darker than  the usual. It was already 10 am here, so I decided to maybe add some light into the room. I got up and went into the switch and click– the room was flooded with lights. I switched it off. It was already 10 am, for sure the world’s biggest and brightest star is up and shining its rays upon this world. The window called me. Like a little child that shyly shows itself, the little rays of the sun seep through the little opening of the window. The curtain made it so impossible for me to see them, it was hanging proud and blocking every rays of sunshine that might come in. (more…)

Crumpled Sheets

She sat by the window, watching the night sky. The stars were shining bright and it gives her that calmness and peacefulness that she needs. The wind blew its soft breeze into her face and into her damp skin– it brings with it the whisper of nature, a soft murmur of the birds and the trees.

“What are you thinking?” he asked as he got up and went into her side.

She looked at him and smiled. He sat beside her and wrapped her into his arms. She willingly rested her head into his shoulder and smelled his scent. How she loves him–every little details that she knew about him and his scent were her favorites. He started kissing her and the temperature of the room suddenly went up and the night took its toll.

She woke up with a bright sun. It was already sunrise and the sun greeted her with its magnificent rays. She turned to her side and sleepily looked for him but touched an empty side.  He was gone. Every time that they were together, she always woke up alone. He’s gone. He would sneak out of her little apartment before the sun goes up, she thinks, she really doesn’t know. Sometimes, she doesn’t want to sleep when he’s around so she would know what time he usually leaves.

“I had a great time darling… see you soon.”

The little note was in the bedside table again. She looked at it for a long time. And her eyes fell into the empty side where he laid last night. The crumpled sheets— it was the only remembrance she can get from what they had last night. It was a reminder that someone came here and loved her. A reminder that she needs to be get used to the fact that she would live her life waking up to nobody but a crumpled sheet.

The why and how

I’m sorry dears for almost a week of no updates in this blog. I’m in a new place now, again. And I’m not saying that I don’t like this place but I would be happier if I would be given the chance to go back to Cebu for good. I’m in Manila right now, on a temporary assignment for 3 months and hopefully I won’t get the extension that some of my colleagues got.

I’m in the adaptation state right now and for me it’s a long process and it would take a lot of courage for me to not start crying every once in a while when the sadness hits me. Yep. I have this habit of crying whenever I miss someone so much. And I know it’s not very good for me because I get a lot of headache when I cry.

The why I am here is a summary of my choice. Yep. I know I made a choice of not saying what I really want and I sure do hope that this will be the last time that I would sit in silence and wonder what would happen if I would say this, or that; will it be a better place– and the long list of what ifs and the like would still continue to go on if I don’t start saying what I want to say. As simple as that.

As what one of the most famous quotes that I have read had said “… the answer will always be no if you don’t ask.” Not the exact words but exactly what I want to say to myself. Yep. So a lesson learned, say what you want and face the consequence or the answer to your question.

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