Can’t Stand Me

2 years ago. Boyfriend(not yet) and me

2 years ago. Boyfriend(not yet) and me

Daily Prompt: What do you find more unbearable: watching a video of yourself, or listening to a recording of your voice? Why?

Answer: Both.

I don’t like listening to myself in a recording. Maybe my voice is a little bit too high pitch. Or, some what not as nicely tuned as that of other people. I don’t like listening to myself talking, multiply that to a hundred when it comes to singing. As I’ve mentioned before, I really really don’t have the beat when it comes to music. Haha. Forgive this music lover with no musical gift at all.

As for the video of myself, it makes me cringe a little bit when I see a video with me in it. My posture is definitely bad, I slouch all the time. My smile is a little bit awkward. My face is too oily. I look fat at that one. I know I’m a little bit too hard at myself when I say those bad things. It makes me think that I’ve been eating what I’ve been saying for years that if I chose to be happy, I should learn to accept who I am and what I am right now. Yes, I definitely gained 20 pounds in the span of two years. Some of my favorite pants, shorts and dresses bade goodbye as my waist line, arms and legs started gaining some more fat or muscle. They were the things that I have to let go to be a little bit healthier.

I’m not really that fat and don’t get me wrong, I do love my body. That’s why I’m trying my best to eat healthy and to exercise. And no, I am not going to be as skinny as I was two years ago, I’ll definitely be underweight and a little bit malnourished if I do that. My goal is to lose 10 pounds, nothing more. And tone my arms, legs and tummy.

As for the prompt again, I still don’t like seeing myself in a video. It’s awkward. Good day! 😛

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