“Now,” invitingly he extend his hands.
“I can’t. You know I can’t,” I try to back away. Feeling the hard rock bumped into my back as I try to get away from him and here.
We were standing in a big rock. At this height, we can be around 50 feet above the sea level. I wasn’t able to ask the depth of the jumping site, I never wanted to know. My feet are shaking, giving me all the reason to back away and go back in the safe haven of our cottage.
“One, two, three.. ahhh!” the exhilarating shout and the adrenaline rush of the other jumper echoed in the area.
I looked at the jumpers and was astonished to see the same fear reflected in their eyes. They have something more in their look, a smirk or an exciting glow as they jump from the edge to the air and the splash. They would swim and take the rocky stair again. And repeat the process all along.
I envy them– of their courage, their taste of adventure and the feeling of fulfillment as they jump, splash and swim back. I just stood there, trying not to panic, trying to breath and tell myself it will be okay.
“Let’s jump now,” he said. Smiling and trying his best to give me confidence.
“I’m sorry. I’m really scared. I really can’t do it, ” I sounded like I’ll definitely cry if he still persist.
He held my hand and played with my fingers as I stare into the jumpers. He leaned into the rock beside me. Staring at the blue sky in front of us.
“Of course you can,” he sounded calm. “It’s just a mind game. It’s mind over matter. You can’t face life being scared all the time. If you don’t take risk–small or big, what’s the purpose of living? Of experiencing the things the world can offer. And, I’m always here. You know that. I’ll make sure nothing bad would come your way. I promise.”
His words were crisp and the meaning were as clear as the water below. I’m always scared. I always fear failure, accident or the things that I can’t control. I seem to be withering, wasting this life with being fearful. From the way I handled my career, education and life– I always play safe. My paranoia is killing the fun that this life can offer.
But the cliff is still too high.
The edge might be too slippery.
I might forget all the basic that I know. The swimming stroke I studied a month ago.
It might be…
“Let’s go,” I tugged him. Taking small steps towards the edge. My feet are shaking and my heart in my throat.
He’s standing by my side. Never letting go of my hand. He was smiling, giving me the confidence that I need. The other jumpers were waiting for their turn, they were eager. And I took some courage from their eagerness.
“One, two, three” and we jumped into the air–towards a life with fear at bay. I screamed my heart out. Letting go of everything. Nothing matters at that moment. Nothing but some exhilarating joy inside of me. Then, the sea took us into its depth.
“That was fun!!!!!” I screamed joyfully as we swim towards the edge of the cliff.
“I knew that you can do it. I told you it would be this fun.” he smiled as he helped me get up to the edge. He planted a kiss on my forehead and tugged me towards the stair again. Life’s just like that, I was reminded as we were ascending. It’s taking a jump from some random cliff and enjoying the moment. And after the jump, you’ll never be the same again. Never.
This is in response to Tipsy Lit Prompt for this week. If you want to join, click the image below to know more about the event. Or, if you want to read some cool stuff from people who are a little bit tipsy while writing, you can still click the link and see that particular amazing realm.