What if?

What if I’m tired
of being an adult,
of being responsible
of thinking before doing something,
of being mature enough,
of being understanding.

What if I’m tired
of the voices within my head,
of the thoughts that I drown,
of the things I cannot say,
of the tears I cannot explain.

What if I’m tired
of not going,
of not staying,
of not flying,
of not being free.

What if?

******************

Sometimes, the weight of the world is too much for us to handle. I’m one of those people who at a certain time in their “adult” life realizes that it’s really hard, like level 999, to be an adult. I need to have a job, think about the future, do this, do that, try to be responsible and all. It’s tiresome. I’m not saying that this phase doesn’t happen to anyone, of course it does, I’m writing this down to remind me (or us, if this applies to you) that I have my own limitations. Sometimes, the world is too much to take. The burden is too heavy that I longed for breaks, night outs, or the mere fact of being free from all the chains of responsibility that are intertwined in my being.

Of course, I can’t. That’s a tough fact. I need to be responsible because that’s what makes us human. Our ability to take responsibility of our actions make us a little bit different from our neighboring specie. And sometimes, this ability is mixed with a lot of other emotions that, as of now, are only imminent in humans. We have the ability to feel a lot of emotions and the proper blending (or juggling?) is definitely a difficult one.

We can’t shape the world in our little hands to adjust on how we feel on a certain day or afternoon, the world moves on, with or without us. It doesn’t stop for anyone and it will never (ever!) stop for me. And all I can certainly do is write this down, hit the post button and try my best not to be too tired of being an adult.

Good night!

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